I cannot believe it has been one year since I walked down the aisle to my sweet Sergio! One year since all our loved ones were under one roof for the weekend. One year since I was so lucky to officially become Mrs. Servello. Ahhh!

To celebrate, we spent yesterday in the city where it all took place – Portland, Maine! S surprised me with a weekend full of surprises! We went back to the exact spot we got engaged two years ago on Peak’s Island, had dinner at our favorite restaurant in the Old Port where we celebrated the night the day we got engaged, had our favorite treat at The Holy Donut which were our wedding favors and walked though the pretty ocean lined cobblestone streets we ran through as newlyweds this very day last year!

It was so fun to reminisce and soak up time with my husband. Now today we are sanding our deck, watching the Patriots and cooking up some good food ha! 🙂 Oh and eating our year old wedding cake 😆

Since this little nook of the internet serves as a little journal, S and I enjoy looking back on today I wanted to share a one year wedding anniversary reflection.

S and I both answered five questions alone and then shared them with one another this weekend <3 Although we answered them separately, it’s funny to see so many similarities in our answers! It’s so fun to take time for activities like this and reminds me of our marriage preparation course. You express feelings you think, but may not have verbalized otherwise!

But first, here are a few related blog posts:
OUR WEDDING: PART I
OUR WEDDING: PART II
OUR PROPOSAL STORY ON PEAK’S ISLAND
OUR ENGAGEMENT PHOTOS
6 THINGS I’VE LEARNED FROM 6 MONTHS OF MARRIAGE

ONE YEAR OF MARRIAGE REFLECTION

WHAT’S YOUR MOST FAVORITE THING ABOUT BEING MARRIED?
SERGIO-
Being married to my best friend. I know it sounds generic but it’s true. Aside from work, Mindy and I spend all of our time together and enjoy every minute of it. We share many of the same values which leads to similar points of view on family, religion, politics, and life. We tend to order the same entree when we go out to dinner, with Mindy copying my order. Haha. All joking aside, its truly a blessing to get to share the rest of my life with my best friend.

MINDY-
Life is one big sleepover with my absolute best friend! S and I have been together since our junior year in high school. For four of these years, we were long distance in college. At a time where many high school sweethearts grow a part, we grew together and this long distance experience strengthened our relationship, but it was not a piece of cake. It took commitment, communication, and absolutely once in a lifetime love [sappy, but true].

Anyways, I worked retail through college and one thing was always on my mind to get to the finish line of the long distance. Sunday’s. Sunday’s were sad through these four years because it was the day of goodbye. The tummy achey see ya in a couple weeks day. While I had that pit in my stomach, I’d be working retail and see happy couple hand-in-hand doing the little things like grabbing dinner, renting a movie or grocery shopping. I spent my four years worth of Sunday’s dreaming of the day I could do normal, mundane things with my Sergio.

All that to say, everyday is like a big, fun, exciting sleepover with my best friend. While traveling abroad or new life chapters are all quintessentially exciting, finding the fun and excitement in a plain old Sunday is a perspective we both have even five years post-long distance.

WHAT ARE THREE QUALITIES YOU ADMIRE ABOUT THE OTHER?
SERGIO-
SELFLESSNESS: Mindy is a very charitable person. She is always looking to help out friends and family. Whether it’s surprising/paying for a new pair of glasses for her grandfather or lending a hand to help local animal shelters feed feral cats Mindy is always putting other’s needs ahead of her own.

NURTURING: Mindy is a crazy cat lady. Haha. In all seriousness, she is a very loving cat mom to our orange tabby cat, Muenster. Whether it’s giving him anti-anxiety medicine during our moves or brushing him everyday, there isn’t a thing Mindy wouldn’t do for Muenster.

KIND: Mindy is a genuinely kind and courteous person. This is most apparent when she interacts with complete strangers when we are running errands. She is never cold or standoffish (which I know I can be sometimes), she is friendly and always willing to help anyone in need.

MINDY –
SELFLESSNESS: S’ selflessness is something I am always appreciative of and know is so rare. From dropping everything at any moment to talk through what’s on my mind or heart, driving 45 minutes out of his way to drop me off after class in high school, always having our furbaby’s needs top of mind to taking 2-5 hours every weekend to photograph blog content the past five years.. the list is endless. He’s always putting our little family above himself and so, so so patient while doing SO. He’s going to make the most amazing Daddy one day.

DRIVE: Sergio’s work ethic is like no other and it is nothing short of admirable. Any of his friends, college mates or work peers would echo this. He puts his all into anything he takes on from his education and his career all the way to projects around the house. He strives to perform at a level that’s well above average, which inspires me to be the very best version of myself.

SILLINESS: I’m the social butterfly, S is more quiet and reserved… unless you’re lucky enough to see the guards come down. When S is around the ones that make him comfortable, he is the most hilarious person I know. Life can be hard, but S is my daily smile. He is my daily belly laugh. He’s my daily dose of FUN. I want to grow old smiling with Sergio, showing our children that life is better with a side of silliness!

WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT FROM THE PAST YEAR?
SERGIO-
The first weekend after we returned from our honeymoon. Although we had been married two weeks prior, this was the first time we were back to reality and in our normal routine. We woke up early, went for a run together, went grocery shopping, then returned home to watch football.  That is when the realness of being married finally hit me. Not only was I wearing a ring, but I was spending quality time with my wife.

MINDY-
I have so many! With the past year representing us being newlyweds, honestly my favorite moment would have to be the second it hit me I was marrying my best friend. I had wanted it to hit me so badly as we drew closer to our wedding day and when it did is a feeling I’ll never forget and a moment in time engrained in my mind like a photograph!

I get the butterflies back just thinking about it. I was sitting in my bridal suite where my cute BRIDE nightie, surrounded by my girlfriends with my hair in curlers and my make up just getting started. I kept being asked if it had hit me yet though our rehearsal dinner the nigh before an that morning, it still hadn’t.

Then our photographer walked in.

My stomach immediately went through the roof with tickling, excitement-induced butterflies and they stayed with me all the way though walking down the aisle together as mister and mrs. I just remember this moment so vividly and I hold it in my heart.

WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT KEEP YOUR RELATIONSHIP AND MARRIAGE STRONG?
SERGIO-
1.PERPETUAL DATING: we make time to go out at least once a week on a dinner date. This allows us to catch up on what’s going on at work or with friends and family. This also allows us to stay connected and never be that couple staring at each other other dinner, never speaking a word.

2.SUPPORTING EACH OTHER’S INTERESTS: As Mindy continues her blog, I am happy to lend a hand whenever she needs me. Also, Mindy knows I am a passionate NFL fan, so she knows that Sundays during the fall, I am busy from 1:00 PM to 9:00 PM 😉

3.CONSTANT COMMUNICATION: Many disagreements can be born out of miscommunication. Whether it’s making assumptions or not effectively communicating, these can be detrimental to a relationship. Mindy and I tend to over communicate, which allows for us to be on the same page for important decisions. (see next question).

MINDY-
1.COMMUNICATION: We both had two different forms of communication displayed in our homes growing up. Through our maturity and growing together, we both have grown to take a mix of the two and form a great, solid bond of communication. Many people say this is key for a relationship, but I think it’s more ‘buzzwordy’ than actually real. It takes work up front. I feel like you need three things:

1.Discuss and understand each other’s communication history because you typically learn and mimic what your parents style. We did this in our marriage prep class and it brought even our great communication foundation up a notch.
2.You need to understand your love languages in my opinion as well. It takes your relationship up a notch in understanding one another, especially with communication and expressing love.
3.And then there is TLC! These three I share more HERE!

All that to say, we strive to keep a transparent, effective line of communication in our marriage.

2.BALANCE WITH FOUNDATION: S and I have the same foundation with communication, morals and finances which are all three the biggest threats to break a relationship. While that foundation holds us strong together, our differences make us a complete unit. I’m a dreamer, he’s a realist. I’m an open book social butterfly, he is quiet and reserved. We balance each other out in so many aspects!

3.BIGGEST SUPPORTER: No matter what happens in life, we are each others rocks. We celebrate the big milestones and little wins. We’re there to support one another when times are challenging. I don’t know what I’d do without the support of S.

ONE PIECE OF ADVICE FOR A NEWLY ENGAGED OR MARRIED COUPLE?
SERGIO-
Never stop communicating. Whether you are deciding what you want for dinner, where you want to get married, or where would want to buy a house – you need to communicate and listen to each other.  Many times people make assumptions about their significant other’s feelings without any sort of verification. This can lead to misunderstandings, frustration, and ultimately hurt feelings. Make sure you over communicate and actively listen.

MINDY-
Prioritize your marriage. Life gets busy. Before you know it, your week is swamped with late nights at the office and the weekend is booked with back to back plans and no 1:1 time for one another. How do you stay connected if you have no 1:1 time together? I suggest openly discussing what an ideal week for your relationship would look like. Make it obtainable, actionable and implement it. And it will change with each season of life, but having this is so important to stay connected, one unified team and feel loved.

For us, we have commitment to one date night a week just between us two and one weekend day free of plans. Both are complete 1:1 time! That means saying no to other plans and that’s okay. While we all need our own identity and time with others, we live in a society where saying ‘no’ is so scary and saying’ yes’ is what we feel is the right thing. Saying no is okay for your mental health, marriage and quality of life. If plans come up, but it’s on “your” weekend day try to schedule it for a weeknight or think “if I miss this event, will it matter in two years?”.

It probably won’t! Having this dedicated 1:1 time that doesn’t get shoved aside when life gets busy is so important to stay connected, one unified team and feel loved.Xo Mindy

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